We are in Christchurch working with habitat humanity to help serve the people who have been effected by the earth quakes. I'm staying with an amazing family who treat me like one of their own.Paul, the director of it all actually reminds me a little of my dad. We now have our own beds with running water and sinks with hand soap along with toilets that are inside our house. Helen, Paul's wife is an amazing cook and continues to knock our socks off with her dinners and deserts.Unfortunately I'm not feeling very good today and have stayed back with Helen who has agreed that this is the best thing I could do. However I think my team is a little frustrated with me because I have been sick so much and they don't understand that I am trying my hardest without destroying myself. Although I want them to all be my best friends, God is telling me to rest and He comes before man. It kinda sucks because I have been becoming closer to the people we stay with rather then my team. I know God is teaching me that not everyone can be best friends but all I can do is love and that's what I'm trying to do more of. It isn't like we don't get along I just feel like I'm able to be a good room mate and that's it. If you know me I'm the type that has at least one really close friend if not more and I wasn't able to find that in my team, however God truly became that person for me. Instead of turning to my team for help I turned to God and he never left my side.
I'm not really sure what God has planned next but I decided that it would be best for me to come home sooner rather then later. I want to make sure that my health is ok by doctors I trust. I need to prepare myself for Australia and not burn my self out before I go there. Plus God has given me some projects to complete before I head off on my next adventure that will hopefully leave an impact on my community. I know God has changed a lot of things and has given my a broader perspective on life just like he always does when I complete a stepping stone with him. All I really know is that I want to live for him and everything I touch will fade unless God is the one guiding my hand.
I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. -Galatians 2:20
If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. - James 1:5
God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. - 1 John 16-18
“The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by human hands. And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything. Rather, he himself gives everyone life and breath and everything else. From one man he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands. God did this so that they would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from any one of us. ‘For in him we live and move and have our being.’ As some of your own poets have said, ‘We are his offspring. -Acts 24-28
Ahh Rotuma was probably one of the hardest adventures of my life. I'm not sure where to begin but I'll start with the description of the Island. There are beautiful white sand beaches everywhere with coconut trees all around that are delicious to eat and drink. However there are 100,000,000 flies that do not leave you alone until the sun goes down and they like to fly all around your food and eat your cuts and get them infected. It was about 110 degrees everyday except on the days that I prayed for rain, which was everyday. I lived like an islander so I got to wash my clothes in a bucket and hang them on the line to dry. We had running water for about 6 hours a day and were very blessed to get about 10 hours of electricity in the night so we could kind of see where we were going. I took tons of bucket showers which are actually pretty nice when you are always dripping in sweat. The mosquito's were horrible and everyone except me got lots of boils all over. However I had to go to the Hospital which is not what it sounds like cause it was the size of my basement so its very under developed. The two nurses and one doctor were very nice which was basically all the staff. I ended up having to go there 4 times because of stomach pains, extreme allergic reaction, heat rashes and two eye infections. The food was super different because everything was grown by them and there are no stores to buy anything so if you don't make your food then you don't eat and there is never a day of no cooking. We cooked over fire cause there is no stove or burners. I saw one cow, 3 pigs and one goat get killed in front of me. They use axes and knives to slit there throats open, however after they were dead I got to eat fresh meat. I now love fish but only if its fresh from the sea. Overall the food was good but we went without some meals cause we didn't know what was in it.The people of Rotuma are so nice and honestly live with the mentality of "what's mine is yours" which really humbled me to experience this kind of selfless giving.
During all of this God was so near to me even though I had to learn a lot of hard lessons. I learned how to rely on God's strength and not my own which was really difficult when you are extremely sick. I'm still not sure on why God acted the way he did while in Rotuma but some day I hope to understand. Here are a couple of examples of what I am talking about. I woke up in the middle of the night with the worst stomach pain i have ever had. I kept praying that God would take it away and an hour later when he still didn't, I became pretty angry cause God being God I knew he could heal me. So when he didn't i decided if i went out side and yelled at him he would change his mind. This didn't work, I fell straight to my knees in pain when I made my way out side and when i was about to let him have it, i looked up to the sky ( so he could hear me more clearly when i would begin to yell) and the stars were breath taking, all my anger dissolved. I have never seen such a star filled sky in my entire life and even more comforting I felt like Jesus was sitting right next to me. Of course he didn't heal me but he comforted me and it was almost like He was saying i have your attention now.
The next example is when my face blew up like a balloon with a itchy,burning rash and all my energy was takin away from me. I went to the hospital again cause the prednizone, antibiotics and cream hadn't helped. So there i was lying in the bed with a burning butt cause they just gave me two shots and a pretty messed up face. The worst part was that the rest of my team was leading a children's bible camp in a village. If you know me then you know how much i love kids so you can imagine how frustrated i was not being able to work with the people i'm good with , children. So here i was about getting frustrated with God as to why i was here and not there and i was ready to try to give it to him again. Just as i was about to give up the older lady come out of no where and pulls up a chair and starts talking to me. I tell her my story about Jesus and at the end of our conversation she offer's to buy me ice cream. Let me fill you in on something, ice cream is like gold in Rotuma, its the first item that goes and its the most expensive. So i was really takin back because ice cream was almost a memory to me but i said no thank you but she persisted and next thing i knew she got nurse to bring me back a whole tub of blitz ice cream. When i received it i seriously felt like God sent me an angle and there again he was sitting right next to me, not saying a word but almost smirking at me cause he knew i couldn't be angry at him.
God knows that I love stars, rain and wind and every time something came up that i didn't understand at least one of these things would capture my attention. God also knows that ice cream, chocolate and pizza are my favorite comfort foods, which also happened to be the 3 hardest items to get on the island, and would some how provide these for me free of charge when I was at my lowest.I believe God wanted me for himself this trip and he doesn't want me to burn myself out cause he plans on using me for the rest of my life. I needed to learn how to slow down and wait on him.
God revealed to me that i need to rely less on my control and trust in him and his plans. Just like in Jeremiah 29:11 God says he has good plans for my life.He asked me do I want to be comfortable in the worlds ways which will amount to nothing or do i want to live faithfully by his word? It is a really hard thing to actually do when you have to live in the world. I'm learning how to be in the world but not live by the ways of the world. God also planted goals for me to do in the season of preparing for Australia. I'm really excited to start living for him every moment not just in the future moments to come. God also gave me a better understanding of how wonderful my friends and family are at home. I'm so thankful for them and their love. God is stirring up some great things and i can't wait to be apart of them.
Therefore we do not lose heart.
Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. -- 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
